In a recent AP Biology class, Ms. Kayla Tennity and her students swabbed their cheeks and tested their DNA to find out whether they were morning or night people. Ms. Leslie Miller decided to get involved as well, and the results of her DNA test were shocking: her sample revealed no sign of DNA of any kind.

These results had some students suggesting that Miller was not from this planet. Is Miller an alien? Does she say “humanoid” too often? Can she do chemistry and dimensional analysis way too quickly? While Tennity attributes Miller’s abnormality to a technical glitch in her cheek swab, others stand by their belief that Miller is not even human at all.

Miller has acknowledged this conspiracy and revealed that it might not just be a theory.

“Since I was a young girl, I’ve always felt different. This test really showed me what that difference is,” Miller said.

The juniors in AP Biology were not surprised at this news, as they had witnessed Miller’s quirks.

“Nothing about the survey results surprised me since she seems to have extraordinary capabilities. She wasn’t even afraid when one of our demos from chemistry exploded right in front of her. Not even a slight flinch,” Katrina Manaloto ‘20 said.

“There’s no evidence that I have chromosomes, so anything is possible for me. I’m imagining now that I was created by an intelligent being and I am an artificially intelligent prototype,,” Miller said.

The lack of evidence due to her non-existent DNA has bewildered her, first as a science teacher and second as a mother.

“If this study has confirmed what I think it has, I am very confused as I am a mother and have three children. Are they human or are they non-humaniods like me?” Miller said.

While the results of this AP Biology study were supposed to inform Tologs about their sleep habit predispositions, it left the honors chemistry queen challenging her previous understanding of herself.